New York fitness culture is a scam. @onikacomedy
Summary
A straphanger tears into New York's fitness scene, arguing nobody actually works out anymore. She tells Kareem that gym-goers are just there for content creation and dating, claiming she joined an expensive gym to find a rich guy but only met old pickleball players and other Black women with the same plan. Now they go to brunch together. She insists personal trainers are a scam and a relationship red flag. If your partner says they're getting a trainer, they're leaving you. The rant extends to running clubs, which she dismisses as desperate friend-seeking. Her advice? Go to a bar like people used to. She greets strangers on the train all the time. Their response is usually "What the fuck is wrong with you?
Full Transcript
So, what's your take? New York fitness culture is a scam.
100% agree. $300 for the membership, $18 for the smoothie, breathing work for $15, and if you get a personal trainer—
That's biased work.
What? It is! Like, if you think about it, personal trainer, what are they doing? You saw those massages when they just rubbing your butt. That is not personal. You're about to lose your partner. If they say that they getting a personal trainer, they leaving. They are out the door. Trust me, I know somebody that I was messing with, you know, they was like, "I want to get buff," and then all of a sudden, this, you know, it's different. Body by Donna. Donna, I'mma get you. Don't date women from Queens. Okay, anyway.
Do you belong to a gym? I do. A very expensive one. And it pissed me off because they got rid of the basketball courts cuz I used to just go to look at the guys like play basketball.
So, so you're just there for for fun. Nobody is going to the gym to work out. Everybody is there with their camera and their phone doing content and nobody is working out. I have never seen nobody sweat in the gym in so long. People have wigs and weaves and eyelashes. Nobody is working out at the gym. They are trying to get people. And the only reason why I go to expensive gym cuz I was trying to get a rich dude. But they're all old. But what happened was it's a bunch of Black ladies doing the same thing. So now we going to brunch. It's no rich men there. And the people that are there playing pickle ball. Who wants an old white man playing pickle ball? Not me. You know what I'm saying?
What about the people that go outside and they pay a guy to take them on a run? A run? Nobody's tracing y'all. It's 10 of y'all on a run. You want friends. They just want friends. They just—you making your heart habitate cuz you want friends. Go to a bar like we used to do back in the day. Say hello. "How you doing?" Stop being weird. It don't have to be on the internet. Meet a person. Hey, people on the train. Say hello. Goddamn.
You say hello to strangers on the train. I say hello to strangers all the time.
And what do they say? They say, "What the f*** is wrong with you?" Cuz this is who you are. That's what they supposed to say. If they said, "How are you?" I'll be like, "You from Ohio." You know what I'm saying?