F Your Job Doesn't Offer Health Care…sneeze at Work
Summary
A straphanger shares his aggressive strategy for workplace healthcare advocacy: if your job doesn't offer health insurance, don't cover your mouth when you sneeze. It's "gorilla warfare," he tells Kareem. The logic is simple. Get everyone sick, force mass callouts, and suddenly your boss is the one stuck restocking shelves and cleaning Chipotle toilets. He's even willing to "turn that staph infection into a staph infection" and steal his boss's medicine if needed. What about innocent coworkers with kids? Casualties of war. The solution is a company-wide memo warning immunocompromised employees to stay home while he spreads the flu as what he calls "peaceful protest." No one has to die, he insists, unless you're immunocompromised.
Full Transcript
So, what's your take? If your job doesn't offer healthcare, you don't offer to cover your mouth when you sneeze when you're at work.
100% agree. Thank you.
It's gorilla warfare, bro. Truly. If they don't offer coverage, you don't offer coverage. All right. That get everybody sick. Everybody got to die until I get healthcare. All right. Think about it like this. If everybody gets sick, then who going, who going to come to work?
No one. It's a protest. If everybody calls in sick, who your, who own the fries? Your boss. Who, who doing cashier? Your boss. Who restocking? Your boss. So this is all him. This is he's.
'Cause if everyone's calling out sick at Chipotle— Then who's there to to clean the diarrhea out of the toilet? That's my question. If everybody's calling in sick at Chipotle, who's going to clean the—
I think it is a disgusting fact of life that we in this country, you have to come to work when you're sick and and they don't offer insurance, bro. Not only you have to come to your boss will have health insurance and you won't. I will get my boss sick and it's steal his medicine. Like I turn that staph infection into a staph infection. Okay.
Oh, bars. Man, we over here.
Turn that staph infection into a staph infection. That's right. It can't just be me and Luigi over here thinking of ideas, guys. All right.
So if you have the flu— I have the flu.
You're going to go to work to just to infect her, spec. I'm going to find the person I hate the most. I'm start, I'm starting with them. I'm angry sneezing on people. I'm I—
What do you say to the people that are like, that's very selfish of you? Like, I I have a child to raise and now you got me sick. I hear you. I understand that and I I've calculated this in my strategy and there are casualties of war. No. Uh, no, we going, we going to send a memo out.
You're sending a memo that says immunocompromised people don't come to work to work— Because I have the flu and I'm coming in. I'm giving it to everyone. And in this way we can uh encourage uh we can encourage the corporations to give us health insurance.
That's right. This is what I would call peaceful protest.
Thank you. Thank you. No one has to die unless you're immunocompromised.