Woody Harrelson Told Me He’s an Anarchist

Maybe just come in a little bit, ma'am. Ma'am, just a little. There we go. Everything's good.

Thanks for your help.

We like you. You should be on here more often. You're doing a great job producing the set.

You do you want an associate producer credit on us?

That would be wonderful.

I got you. [music]

So, what's your take? They're loading planes improperly. They should load it from back to front. More efficient. Doesn't clog things up all the way down the line. You start.

I actually don't know why everyone's always in a rush to get on the plane, to be honest with you.

We're all going to the same spot.

But why do you think everyone's always in a rush? There's something psychologically about being at the airport, and then there's a certain level of tension and stress.

Yeah. Until people are seated, and then they relax a little bit. But meanwhile, you're blocking the whole ability for people to see themselves officially.

It's, it's, they're, they're clogging it up. The people in the front are clogging it up. They're clogged. The motivation is people pay first, they pay.

The, it's a purely a psychological class-based system.

Yeah. And as a closet proletariat, I want to encourage the same. You know, you load from, you load from back to front.

All right. So this is, this is like a class issue. You can't be a closet prolet. I'm a closet proletariat sympathizer.

The people's champ. A closet floor. No, no, you're a public proletariat sympathizer.

Okay, that's quite, you stand with the proletariat.

Yeah. You know, I didn't know what that word meant for a long time.

Yeah. Yeah. [laughter] It has something to do with magic, right?

Oh, magic. Yeah. Yeah. Like David Blaine.

Thank you for bringing that up, by the way. David Blaine, one of my best friends. I've been with him for the last four days. He was a magician for the proletariat.

His first specials, street magic, I believe they're called. He's a people's, he's a people's magician.

Yeah. He's part of the proletarian.

Yeah.

Yeah. You're sticking with this proletarian thing. I like it. It was sticky in your vocabulary right away. You're going to be saying this all day. [music]

I've read that you've described yourself as a self-described anarchist. I am an anarchist. Yeah. I mean, I just don't believe in government. I I don't ever see it work effectively.

Is that as an anarchist, anti-government?

You're just doubt.

Yes. I think that's the right way to put it. I'm not an anarchist. I'm anti-government. [laughter] Anti-all government existing. I mean, do you, do you, do you see government working effectively ever? I mean, it's very rare.

It doesn't work. And granted, it's, it's important, like you want to have stop signs, and you know, but when it comes to running the country, you know, first of all, it's all about helping themselves and helping their friends, retaining power, accruing resources, etc. If I were going to run, I would create a new party called socialist capitalism. And the shirts would say,

"If you want to be rich, be rich." [laughter] Everyone's taken care of under the socialism part, but if you want to be rich, be rich.

It's called socialist capitalism. It's my invention. I'd vote for you, dude.

Look at that. That's what I'm talking about.

Yeah, 'cause we all contain multitudes. I mean, I honestly think you should run. I mean, we need some real, what we need is people who really care. Yeah, I care.

You know, and that's, that's pretty rare.

Yeah. So, when did you become an anarchist? I mean, I'm not hardcore about these things. Like, I'm total proletariat, but I'm total capitalist at the same time. So, you know, in, in a sense, within me is a lot of dysfunctionality because uh, contrasting viewpoints.

But that's okay. That's okay. It's okay to be both. Thank you. It's like being bisexual.

It is.

Okay. Yeah.

Okay. [laughter] [music]

You studied theology in college.

Yeah. I, I thought about becoming a minister. The Church of Harelson. [laughter]

No.

You'd be a celebrity minister?

Uh, no. No. This was when I was much younger. Before I was a celebrity. What led you to want to study...

A celebrity? I kind of gave up on it. And then my religion became hedonism.

Yeah. So the rumors are true. [laughter]

That's what fame does to a man. Well, it, it, you know, like suddenly everything's available to you, and then eventually, you know, you grow out of it or you don't. But

How did the hedonism manifest into your daily life? Um, I became very sense-oriented.

Like you were pursuing earthly pleasures. That's true. Well, you know, once you, it's almost like an athlete who, you know, they finally, you know, they, they're done with their, their whatever their athletic pursuit is, and then they, they're eating a lot and they're drinking. And sometimes when you hold something off from yourself, as you do when you're hyper religious like I was,

Uh, you boomerang. You go to the other direction for a while. How you feeling? You can say,

I'm good.

Yeah. Yeah.

What's your name? I'm Ted Clark.

No, Ted.

Ted.

Yeah.

Oh, good night. People call me Teddy.

That's Ted.

That's Ted.

Nice to meet you, Ted.

Nice to meet you.

How you doing? Nice to meet you, Ted.

Yeah, you too. Can I get a selfie with you? Let's do it.

Uh, do you want to be in the picture? Yeah, man.

Yeah, I'll be in it too, if you want. All right. Awesome.

Thank you, man. Thanks for letting me...

All right. All right. Good. Yeah. I had to get in there with you. I hope you don't mind.

I'm, I'm the next mayor.

I'm not the next mayor.

By the way, you're going to have to start thinking about Iowa when you get into politics. I'm not getting into, I am not into...

You are, you're going to be the mayor of New York. Then you're going to be the governor, and then you're going to go for a senator. I think I'm just gonna...

I said didn't...

I can't. I was born in a different country.

Which one?

Egypt.

That's, that's going to be different. The land of ten thousand lakes.

I thought that was Minnesota. I'm also from Minnesota. Happened to be born in Egypt, raised in Minnesota.

Fun fact, what state in the union has more shoreline than any other state?

Alaska. Bingo. Not bad. Not right. But anyone else?

Hawaii.

Texas.

Did you just say Hawaii? Okay. Not bad. Not right. Texas, a good choice.

Okay.

Huh?

Florida.

Yeah. Wrongo. Bongos. [laughter] Anybody else?

Now that's a good guess. No. Huh? Minnesota has the most shoreline.

Oh, because of the lakes.

No, the lakes.

That's a trick question. We're going to go right. That's a trick question, Woody. That's, that's unfair.

Yeah. But it's a good, it's called magic. You've been hanging out with David Blaine too much. That's called word magic. Great job, man. We're going to get someone to come through here.

We got a live studio audience.

Let me see if I got a couple. I don't have a couple bucks. Oh, that guy's got it.

Oh, no. You don't have to get...

Oh, this is good.

By the way, that's the producer.

By the way.

Oh, that's actually the producer.

Oh, that's the producer of the movie now. You see?

Yeah. This, this is Bobby. This is Bobby Cohen, the producer. Now You See Me. I was just on the subway. I had no idea you guys.

Want to know something? I was wondering why that guy was following us around.

Yes, sir. I have a good one. I like your jacket out.

That's nice.

Oh, that's cool.

U.S. Air Force.

Can I tell you something? This guy's loaded. [laughter] I just became a father to a girl.

Congratulations.

You got, you have trace of those. I think...

I do. I have, you have three. You have trace leches. Three white babies.

That's true.

Trace leches. You have trac...