Polyamory don't count if it's in a big city
Summary
A straphanger with Zimbabwean polygamist roots delivers a scorching take: polyamory doesn't count in big cities. His logic? Having a polycule in Brooklyn is like being a Republican in Texas, unimpressive and trying too hard. "If you're a polycule at Piggly Wiggly, then you lit," he tells Kareem, arguing that polyamory only matters in places like Pensacola, Florida. The conversation spirals into whether "hoe" is actually the highest relationship tier, the exhausting logistics of poly group chats, and his brutal assessment of New Yorkers with "Polly" in their Instagram bio: "It just means you smell like skin." He's never been poly himself. Not enough hoes, and frankly, he can barely keep up with his existing group chats.
Full Transcript
So, what's your take? Polyamory don't count if it's in a big city. 100% disagree. Nah, bro. It's just like you got mad partners in New York, that doesn't matter. Oh, you got a polycule in Brooklyn, that's just roommates, baby. I think polyamory doesn't matter anywhere. If you're like in Pensacola, Florida with five partners, that's popping. That's if you're a polycule at Piggly Wiggly, then you lit.
Yes. Yes. Yes. I see where you're going with this. I like 100%. There are 8 million people out here and everyone's in a polycule or cheating. Just say you have hoes and hoes is non-binary. I've got hoes in one area code and it's because my wife lives in it. I think when I think when you become a wife, you get upgraded from hoe to wife. Like hoe to partner.
I think partner is a downgrade. From hoe. I think ho is the highest level of of person. I don't know. I love hoes. A hoe is like a Hyundai Sonata. A partner is like a Mercedes-Benz. You know what I'm saying?
So you think that be that there's no such thing as polyamory in a big city? I come from Zimbabwe. I come from a polygamist. Like my great-grandfather was a polygamist, right?
Oh, that's cool. So, I'm not new to this. I'm true to this. You know what I'm saying? So, you live in uh Zimbabwe Bushwick?
Yeah. Does it Bushwick or Zimbabwe? Yeah. Just just Bush. But like, no. On both sides, polygamy was like a thing. So, it was like you had families, you had communities, and it's like you kept each other together, and it was dope. And I feel like when you're in a smaller space, like being Pauli in Brooklyn is like being a Republican in Texas. Like, ooh, you're so brave.
So, somebody lives in New York and they have Polly in their Instagram bio. How does that make you feel? It just means you smell like skin.
Have you ever been poly? Nah, never. Not enough hoes. I don't think I can afford it. I think Paulie is just it's too much text messaging cuz these days a relationship is one thing. It's not it's text. It's memes back and forth. That's it. And I can barely keep up with the group chats that I'm already in and now you got to have the poly group chat. The poly group chat and then there's like tension there cuz somebody might send like a funny gift and you laugh at that one but you don't laugh at the other one. It's just mad work. And then you got to have like an apartment that can hold all these people because you can't be Paulie with like people outside the If you want to be Pauly, go live in Las Vegas. Go live in Peoria, Illinois.